What is i feel like i'm competing with my boyfriend's mom?

It's common to feel like you're competing with your boyfriend's mom. This feeling can stem from several factors:

• Insecurity: You might feel insecure about your place in your boyfriend's life and whether you measure up to his mother's standards or expectations. This insecurity can be amplified if she is very involved.

• Perceived Criticism: Even if unintentional, comments or actions from his mother might be interpreted as criticism of your choices, lifestyle, or relationship. This can lead you to feel like you're constantly being judged.

• Differing Expectations: You and his mother might have different ideas about what constitutes a good partner or a successful relationship. This can cause friction and a sense of competition.

• Boundary Issues: If his mother is overly involved in his life or relationship, it can feel like she's overstepping boundaries, making you feel like you're vying for his attention and affection. Understanding and establishing appropriate boundaries can be key.

• Jealousy: You might feel jealous of the established relationship he has with his mother, particularly if they are very close. This can manifest as feeling competitive for his time and attention.

• Fear of Replacement: On a deeper level, you might fear that his mother will always hold a special place in his heart and that you can never fully replace her importance in his life.

Addressing these feelings often involves:

• Self-Reflection: Understanding the root cause of your feelings. Are you insecure? Do you perceive criticism where none is intended?

• Communication: Openly and honestly communicating with your boyfriend about your feelings, without blaming his mother. Focus on how her actions make you feel.

• Establishing Boundaries: Working with your boyfriend to establish healthy boundaries with his mother. This might involve limiting her involvement in certain aspects of your relationship.

• Building a Relationship: If possible, trying to build a positive relationship with his mother. This doesn't mean you have to be best friends, but finding common ground and showing respect can help ease tension.

• Professional Help: If these feelings are overwhelming or negatively impacting your relationship, consider seeking therapy to help you process your emotions and develop coping mechanisms. Understanding your attachment style can be useful.